Insider Tips - 34

A Google search of the words "dining etiquette" unearthed close to 10,000 matches. Obviously, there is a fairly large obsession happening out there - and well there should be. Any number of companies seem to have sprung up, dealing almost entirely with dining etiquette for biz types who still find themselves attending lots of lunches and dinners despite the wired world.

We've attended more than our fair share as well and, God bless 'em all, there are far too many people out there who still don't know a fish knife from a fishing pole. The smart ones have figured out that if they didn't learn proper table etiquette in their formative years, they'd better do so now, or watch their careers dribble to a halt along with the hollandaise on their chins.

Here are ten basic tips, useful either when attending those large hotel ballroom business luncheons with head tables longer than an airport runway, or dining with the boss:

1. Wait until everyone at your table is seated before you start to gobble the starter course of soup or salad or whatever, even if it's already been plated and is awaiting your attention. Also, wait to see if this is one of those events, which will be proceeded by a blessing. You really don't want to be the atheist with a mouthful of endive in an otherwise quiet, attentive room.

2. Sit up straight. Keep the elbows off the table while eating. Don't slump back and don't sprawl over the tables. This bit of parental advice actually works better now that you're an adult. Kids are cute and can therefore sometimes get away with bizarre posture; full-sized adults definitely can't.

3. If it's soup you've ordered as part of a business lunch or dinner, dip the spoon in, move it away from your body, filling the soup spoon "bowl" about two-thirds full. Now, try not to plunge the entire thing into your mouth. Sip the soup (don't slurp it) from the side. If you've been served a handled soup cup, for bouillon for example, you can - and should - pick it up to drink. If it's salad that's served, and the leaves and bits and pieces are too large, cut them up, for heaven's sake.

4. Your bread-and-butter plate is always to your left. Your water, wine, juice are always to your right.

5. Do not cut open a bread roll. Do not slather butter all over each half as if you were about to make yourself a peanut butter-and-jam sandwich. Break off bite-sized pieces, and butter only as you eat them.

6. If some one asks you to "pass the salt", pass both the salt and pepper. Do so by placing them on the table near the person closest to the one with the request. Do not use the salt before passing it along.

7. There are two styles of handling a knife and fork -- the more American "zig-zag" method -- after cutting the food, transferring the fork to the right hand while resting the knife. And there is the so-called British style which has the fork always remaining in the left hand - tines facing down - and the knife in the right. Whatever your preference, don't grip either utensil in a fist because you may look as you have yet to graduate from day care or you're a homicidal menace.

8. Put your napkin on your lap before you start eating. If you have to excuse yourself from the table briefly, put the napkin on your chair, not on the table. It only goes on the table when you are completely finished.

9. A fingerbowl is generally only seen these days at quite formal events. You can usually recognize it by the lemon slice often floating in it, or the fact that it most often arrives before or after the dessert course. Just gently dip your fingers and just as gently wipe them dry with your napkin, then set the bowl off to the side of your plate.

10. Finally, if you have to remove something from your mouth, there is a simple rule to remember: More often than not, you can take something out the same way you put it in. Olive pits can be deposited, quietly, into the palm of your hand, for example, but if it's something really gross, you'll have bring your napkin up to your mouth and as discreetly as possible, get rid of it while keeping it out of everyone's sight.

Remember: Job candidates for high-powered positions are often taken out for a meal during the interview process. Nuff said….except, no toothpicks in public, ever!

Davidson Communications is always available for fine dining, at which time, we'll go over the fine points of paying and tipping.